The Retribution add-on for Dawn of War II adds the Imperial Guard. You know the Imperial Guard, right? They’re normal dudes, like you and me, but with ruthless leaders, big guns, and tanks. There are at least ten ways they can kick ass. For instance:
7. With the Commissar Lord’s fists
The Commissar Lord is an Imperial Guard leader built to lead men into the thick of battle. All three of his weapon upgrades are melee weapons. The two most powerful are the Power Fist and Fist of Brockus, both of which are effective against all target types. You know what that means, don’t you? Tank punching! Unlike the other Imperial Guard leaders, the Commissar Lord doesn’t start with any skills. Instead, he has a retinue of followers tagging along. Give him the Carapace Armor or a Flak Jacket for more health. Now equip Stubbornness in his equipment slot and he’ll regenerate health based on the number of nearby infantry. Now go punch some tanks and bring along plenty of friends.
It’s a bit cruel to dribble out screenshots like these for a game that won’t be out until probably right before Black Friday 2011. Particularly a game as eagerly awaited as Batman: Arkham City. But what am I going to do? Ignore them?
After yesterday’s somewhat harrowing helicopter ride, it was a relief to discover that today I got to ride a mouse. I think my sackbot is much more geared for mouse riding anyway, especially with mice as agreeable as those in this day’s level, Mousehole.
One of the joys of playing these community levels without having played the actual game itself so much is the discovery. Even when I get frustrated with a level design I find I’m only a little ways away from feeling a sense of wonder. I started this level and saw these mice floating at the top of the screen, right under me. They all had triangles over their heads, and I assumed this meant they had something to say to me so I ignored them and fell to the bottom of the screen. I couldn’t do much down there but be chased by a scrapbooky cat. I started over and this time pressed the triangle only to discover that this was not to get the mice to speak, but to activate them for riding. Now I could scoot all over the level, avoid the cat more easily (pictured), and even have the opportunity to drop into another level called Mousehole Reloaded (yes, there is also Mousehold Revolutions) where I could ride my mouse over to a jukebox and choose my tunes for the extra level.
The other side of not knowing what I’m doing is that I’m often confused by objects in these worlds. The prompt to drop grabinators and controlinators and otherinators always furrows my brow. Am I supposed to drop the object? What if I don’t? Is the game just being polite by giving me the option, or trying to tell me something? Am I being rude if I want to hold onto my grappling hook? Because that gives me comfort.
I suppose if I played more of the story I’d get a better understanding of these issues. I’ll get around to it. The discovery phase is too great to worry about that right now.
Bromance alert. If a frank discussion about why friends are so freaking awesome and why they are deserving of love is going to make you uncomfortable, you should probably leave the room. Imagine klaxons are sounding if you need an excuse. Tell your loved ones there’s an air-raid and hide under the dining room table. This is about to get real.
I have fallen for this game. Truly. This is not normal for me. I don’t fall for many games. In point of fact, I don’t play many games. I have fallen for this one. And I know, categorically, that I could not have done this on my own. I needed help. For this I am grateful.
From February 22 until March 1, PSN users have the chance to vote for your favorite game in each of the four categories by downloading a free XMB theme corresponding to that game. At the end of the voting period, the four winning games — one per category — will go on sale at a 30% discount…
Well, okay, that’s a weird way to vote. I have to download a theme for my PS3? And the prize is that the winning game, which I presumably already have if I voted for it, goes on sale?
But what’s even weirder is the list of nominees. Last year had some truly wonderful stuff available for download from the Playstation Store, much of it exclusive to the PS3 or PSP. Yet many of them are conspicuously absent from the nominees.
Where is Hoard, the really cool dragon game based on harvesting gold and princesses from a dynamic kingdom? Where is No Heroes Allowed, the latest iteration of those wacky dungeon ecology sims with names like Holy Invasion of Privacy, Badman? Where is Z.H.P., the fantastically detailed grindfest RPG from the creators of Disgaea? Where is Cladun (pictured), one of last year’s finest RPGs on any platform?
Also, Sony, while I’m berating you: Where is Patapon 3? Figure it out, Sony.
Here’s who you can have sex with in Dragon Age II. Along with what I could call fan fiction, although it’s actually written by the developers, so it’s technically just fiction, kind of like the novel that came with Elemental. Dig it:
It doesn’t take long for a foul-smelling longshoreman to show up. Isabela stiffens as she feels a hand, low on her back. The longshoreman opens his mouth to say something, but never gets the chance. Isabela grabs the man by the wrist, twisting his arm behind him. His cry is one of shock rather than pain, but that quickly changes as Isabela rams her elbow into the back of the neck, slamming his face into the wooden bar-top.
“Touch me again, and I’ll break more than just these,” she hisses in his ear. And then she snaps the fingers of the offending hand. I hear a crunch, several sickening pops, and a howl of pain. The longshoreman slinks away, cradling his hand and spitting curses.
“What?” she says, holding the empty tumbler out for a refill and daring me to make a comment, any comment. I gesture towards her striking outfit — nothing but a chemise worn without the benefit of a jacket or cloak, covering only the barest minimum required for decency. Put on something like that, and you’re going to get attention whether you want it or not.
“What? This?” She picks at the laces on her bodice, then lets out a short, bitter laugh. “Would’ve dressed up for you, but I left all my polite clothes at the bottom of the ocean.”
Get it on with Isabela when Dragon Age II comes out on March 8.
It looks like Double Fine still has to work out some “poly penetration” issues in the above tech demo, but what a great way to announce they’re working on a Sesame Street game for Microsoft’s Kinect to be published by Warner Bros. Interactive.
In a truly original interactive experience, young players join Cookie Monster, Elmo and other Sesame Street characters as they explore a living storybook titled Once Upon a Monster. In the book, they make new zany monster friends from the Once Upon a Monster world and share in their adventures, solving problems, forging friendships and learning key life skills along the way. Parents and children literally become part of the whimsical storybook adventure by getting active together through dancing, jumping, flying and more.
It’s not a game I’ll be playing — I don’t have a Kinect, for starters — but I couldn’t be happier that the studio that made Brutal Legend for me is working on something a) with a license that will ensure sales, and b) that will get kids hooked on Tim Schafer’s sense of humor so they’ll buy more Double Fine games when they grow up. I hope Once Upon a Monster sells a bazillion copies.
Jane McGonigal, author, game designer, and futurist, has a column over at Huffington Post in which she informs us that playing video games will make us healthy, wealthy, and wise. But only if we restrict our playing to an hour a day. What’s more, a good game will not only make us more creative, optimistic, and goal oriented, it will also make up for what real life currently lacks.
The truth is this: in today’s society, computer and video games are fulfilling genuine human needs that the real world is currently unable to satisfy. Games are providing rewards that reality is not. They are teaching and inspiring and engaging us in ways that reality is not. They are bringing us together in ways that reality is not.
She’s written a book detailing actual scientific research into this so that gamers, and their parents, can look at gaming as preparation for life’s challenges, like curing cancer and ending world hunger. But those possibilities pale in comparison to the real breakthrough in her research.
And just 90 seconds of playing a game like World of Warcraft – where you have a powerful avatar – can boost the confidence of colleges students so much that for up to 24 hours later, they’re more likely to be successful taking a test at school… and more outgoing in real-world social situations.
Whoa! Great news for WoW players! You folks now only have to play for a minute and a half. Science has just given you your life back.
Read the post to find out how much gaming is too much and adjust your lives accordingly.
I flew a helicopter tonight. Yes, it was to no avail. The thing was impossible to control, and flying it did me no more good than running would have done. Or keeping my cool little jetpack on. But now I can say I’ve flown a helicopter in one of these levels. That’s never happened before. You know what else has never happened before? I’ve never gotten this direction from one of the creatures in a level:
“Kill those things.”
Whoa. I don’t recall seeing the word ‘kill’ in any part of LBP2 as yet. Maybe I just missed it. But it struck me here. True, the killing in this latest level, outbreak 1, consists entirely of firing what I think is a paint gun, but still, I was given the directive to kill. That caught me up short for a moment. My little sackbot is now a killer. I will have to take stock of that.
I’ll let you know when, and if, I get a machine gun.
Last week, Atari said they would implement fixes for Test Drive Unlimited 2’s clubhouses, a cornerstone of the game’s social advancement, on Monday evening. Which they did. Briefly.
Earlier today we made an attempt to bring Club functionality online, but due to a new issue being discovered, we took it down immediately to get things fixed. At this time we don’t have an exact ETA of when Clubs will become available, though its a top priority and we’re working to get them back into the game ASAP.
The short version: “Never mind.”
Furthermore, the multiplayer races are still borked. I find it hard to believe that when I choose the blanket overall option to join a multiplayer match, there simply isn’t one. Seriously? There isn’t a single multiplayer match you can put me into? The game has been out a week and I’ve been unable to play it multiplayer, either as a head-to-head race or in one of the nifty cooperative modes that I’ll supposedly be doing with the other members of my club once the padlocks are taken off the clubhouse.
I love what this game is trying to do. I look forward to some indeterminate point in the future when it actually does it.
You can’t swing a dismembered necromorph without hitting a blandly positive review of Dead Space 2. But I’d like to direct you to two more guarded Dead Space 2 reviews.
The first is from Thomas Grip, whose thoughts on Dead Space 2 are far more informed, informative, and insightful than what most of us reviewers write, thanks to Grip’s unique perspective on horror games. He’s the co-founder of Frictional Games, the developer of Amnesia: the Dark Descent. That game is very different from Dead Space 2, although they’re both “horror” games. One is an adventure game with some unique gameplay mechanics intended to express the genre of choice. The other is just another expensive looking shooter in which stuff jumps out at you a lot. Grip’s comments make me wish more developers would speak frankly about other videogames.
And speaking of what most of us reviewers write, you can read my review of Dead Space 2 here. Thumbs down, by the way.
(Thanks to Paul for the link to Grip’s Dead Space 2 article!)
When you die in Demigod, you get put in a penalty box. You’re looking down from heaven, inert and wistful, while cool stuff happens underneath you, without you. It’s like The Lovely Bones.
After the jump, League of Legends is like A Beautiful Mind meets Confessions of a ShopaholicContinue reading →
That’s my character in DC Universe Online. She looks that way because I tailored her to look that way. Nice and normal and unassuming. But don’t be fooled. She’s decked out in fancy gear. Being in the endgame, I’m even grinding for specific bits of gear, which seem to come at the rate of about one piece every week or so if I log in to play a few instances every day or so.
(Psst, Sony, can you hurry up with the new content due this week?)
But every bit of gear you find belongs to a specific costume set and therefore has a specific look, usually outrageous. So what does a character look like when you don’t carefully monitor your style? What if you left your appearance up to the game?
Hey, look, it’s Marvel vs. Capcom 3 (pictured?). Which, yep, is another fighting game. What sets this one apart from other fighting games is that, uh, it’s more colorful? I’m actually not sure. I’m going to have to consult with an expert. Meanwhile, I intend to keep mashing buttons until I actually like it.
Also out this week are two (2) games that are fifteen (15) years old, but available for the first (1st) time on a handheld system. Dragon Quest VI: First Time in America is a reissue of a Dragon Quest game for the Nintendo DS. The twist in this Dragon Quest game is that it was only released in Japan. Tactics Ogre: Never Let Me Go is an updated remake of Tactics Ogre. I’m sure they’re both great, because a game’s got to be pretty good to convince a publisher it’s still worth selling fifteen years later.
