Spintires update ruins the Quarter to Three review

In my review of Spintires, the game of survival horror in which mud tries to kill various real-world driverless Soviet trucks, I wrote the following:

You as a driver, as a person, as a foot on a gas pedal and a pair of hands, dont exist. Whether its because [developer] Oovee didnt want to fuss with character models or because its an intentional effort to focus on the element of machines vs nature without mere humanity in the middle to muck it all up, the world of Spintires is like Maximum Overdrive, that dopey horror movie where trucks come alive and drive themselves around. Not for the cheese factor, of course. You wont find Emilio Estevez servicing a semi with a carnival mask on its grill. Its Maximum Overdrive for the basic vibe of trucks having to rely on themselves. These trucks are on their own. They have no drivers. You cannot angle the camera to look into the cab and see an expressionless character model with his hands perched fingerlessly on the wheel. You will never see a person in this game. People simply dont exist anymore, or theyve gone far away. These wildernesses are as empty and still as a crashed server.

Today, a year and a half later, my review is obsoleted with this news:

The biggest update to the game so far that…finally shows the driver behind the wheel. An animated physical driver [is introduced for] all vehicles. You can watch him turning the steering wheel, changing gears, operating hand-brake and reacting to the forces affecting the truck.

Thanks, Spintires. Just what I didn’t want. But the update, available now, also adds five new trucks. Now you can drive the B-66, the B-131, the C-4310, the D-537, and even the K-700. I don’t know what those are either.