Tags: game diaries

Project Cars 3: the Corkscrew of the Antipodes!

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Like most colonies, Australia was built from its coasts inward.  If you go inland from Sydney, you can’t get very far without bumping into the Blue Mountains.  But just beyond the Blue Mountains, settlers discovered an expanse of arable land called Bathurst Plains, watered by Australia’s largest river system.  To open the way from Sydney, a hundred-mile road was built through the mountains, ending at the newly founded town of Bathurst in 1815.  It was Australia’s first inland colony.

Today, 37,000 people live in Bathurst.  South of the town is a 400-foot rise called Mount Panorama, because you can stand on it and get a nice view of the town.  The town spray painted the words MOUNT PANORAMA on the slope, in bright white capital letters.  Not quite as showy as erecting giant wooden letters over Hollywood, but the sensibility is the same.  Five times a year, the streets in the southern part of Bathurst are closed off for racing through town, up the slope of Mount Panorama, and back down into town.  This is where I went for today’s rivals event in Project Cars 3.  And this is where I discovered one of my new favorite things in racing.

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Project Cars 3: shame and loathing at 1,190 horsepower

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Are Rivals events like New York Times crossword puzzles?  Is Saturday the day for sadistic challenges?  Why else would I be driving Project Cars 3’s most powerful car in the rain?  Why else would I be hydroplaning in a car so absurdly overpowered that it doesn’t even have a name?  Why else would I have done what I did to finish this challenge?  Why else would I sink to these depths of shame and loathing?

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Project Cars 3: how not to make a car

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It might surprise you to know this, but I’m no car expert.  Everything I know about cars I Googled and then forgot ten minutes later.  When I go to the mechanic, I make a great show of nodding sagely while he explains in detail why he’ll be charging $742.18 to my credit card.  He might as well be speaking Klingon.  

However, I do know physics, common sense, and today’s rivals event in Project Cars 3.  I also know the ongoing weekly rivals event that will be in effect for two more interminable days.  From these things, I have some advice to offer the supposed experts who make fancy cars.  Because right now, they’re Doing It Wrong.  So I’m going to tell them how to make their fancy cars work better.

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Project Cars 3: top ten reasons I didn’t get a better lap time today

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Today’s daily event was a lap around Donington Park, which is a real-world track in Leicestershire, England.  The track is named after a nearby castle, which I probably climbed around on while playing Assassin’s Creed: Valhalla.  The car is called a Caterham. I’ll have more to say about it shortly.  There will be cussing.  My best lap time, after using all 20 available attempts, was 1 minute and 38.589 seconds.  As of this writing, that puts me in the silver ranking at 132nd place.

Following are ten reasons I’m not in 131st or better place.

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Project Cars 3: a month of Rivals mode

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One of the multiplayer modes in Project Cars 3 is called Rivals.  It consists of month-long seasons.  Each month, there is a single event which you can drive as often as you like to improve your standing.  There are also rotating weekly events and daily events, each with a limited number of attempts.  When each event closes, you win points based on how you placed on the leaderboard.  Those points accumulate over the course of the season.  At the end of the season, everybody’s ranked and wins experience points based on how well they did.  And, of course, you’re earning experience points along the way just by driving the events.  However you choose to play, you’re always making progress in Project Cars 3.  If you drive, you advance.

But what if I let Project Cars 3 have a turn at the wheel?

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