Wallet threat level: call of ports

, | Games

Several ports caught my eye this week. An Owlcat RPG coming to the Switch 2 set in a universe almost incomprehensible to me. An amazing Flight Simulator that’s hopefully fixed now that it’s coming to PS5. A game about digging a hole that’s coming to Xbox and Game Pass. The critically acclaimed Thank Goodness You’re Here, whose humor is very British apparently, finally making its way to Xbox. A tower defense / exploration / mining hybrid coming to Xbox and Game Pass this week. Some Christmas themed horror games ported to Xbox that might or might not be terrible. Current gen upgrades of the Yakuza 0, 1 and 2.

But enough about the ports. How about those shiny new games? The delayed Terminator 2D: No Fate should finally make its way to literal shelves this week, since it was delayed to coincide with the physical release. Skate Story looks really trippy and weird and could be very cool. Unbeatable, a two-button rhythm game, finally makes its way to us after being a success on Kickstarter about five years ago. And hopefully Drywall Eating Simulator can bring some good comedy to us in a bite-sized adventure (their joke, not mine).

Monday (12/8/25):​

  • Skate Story (PC, PS5, Switch 2) – “You are a demon in the Underworld, made out of glass and pain. The Devil has given you a skateboard with a simple deal: Skate to the Moon and swallow it — and you shall be freed.”
  • Three Yakuza Re-releases (PS5, Xbox, PC) – “The Dec. 8th Like a Dragon & Yakuza™ series 20th Anniversary releases of Yakuza Kiwami, Yakuza Kiwami 2, and Yakuza 0 Director’s Cut on PlayStation 5, Xbox Series X|S and Steam will offer discount options to players who have existing digital versions of Yakuza 0, Yakuza Kiwami, and Yakuza Kiwami 2 as a token of appreciation for their continued support of the series.”
  • Unboxathon (PC) – “Unboxathon is a cute content-packed incremental game about opening mystery boxes. Find rare items, upgrade your skills, and unlock new boxes & features! Collect shiny items, pop bubble wrap, and materialize artifacts out of thin air. Can you find your lost childhood plush?”
  • Angeline Era (PC) – “Every level is hidden in plain sight in this nonlinear 3D Action-Adventure game! Travel a vast country’s unmarked overworld in search of the next challenging fight, humorous encounter, or mysterious landscape. You decide what you discover next in this world of Fae, Humans and Angels!”
  • Microsoft Flight Simulator 2024 (PS5) – “Explore the world with our largest fleet of aircraft and take simulation to new heights while pursuing your aviation career within Microsoft Flight Simulator 2024. The Standard Edition includes over 65 aircraft and 150 handcrafted airports.”

Tuesday (12/9/25):​

  • Thank Goodness You’re Here (Xbox) – “After arriving early for a big meeting with the mayor of a bizarre Northern English town, a traveling salesman takes the time to explore and meet the locals, who are all very eager to give him a series of increasingly odd jobs…”
  • A Game About Digging A Hole (Xbox) – “Dig deep, sell what you find, update your equipment to continue your journey further and further. With every spadeful you dig, you get closer to the truth.”
  • Dome Keeper (Xbox) – “Defend against waves of alien monsters in this unique roguelike action mining game. Use the time between attacks to dig beneath the surface in search of valuable resources and relics – deliver them back to your dome to unlock powerful upgrades and useful new gadgets.”
  • Unbeatable (PS5, Xbox, PC) – “Unbeatable is an anime-juiced rhythm adventure where you (figuratively) destroy on stage while you (literally) destroy on stage. During rhythm gameplay, you only need two buttons: a button for up and a button for down. Simple to understand! The complicated part is doing it. Try not to get destroyed yourself.”

Wednesday (12/10/25):​

  • Montezuma’s Revenge: The 40th Anniversary Edition (PS5, Xbox, Switch) – “The 1983 classic multi-room platformer Montezuma’s Revenge returns in 2.5D glory, and now Pedro’s adventure is bigger than ever with 100 tricky rooms to explore! For its 40th anniversary, what was once an unfinished game is now resurrected to match the full vision of creator Robert Jaeger. This time you can choose between male and female explorers, Pedro or his sister Rosita, to delve deep into the dangerous ruins and hunt for treasures untold!”
  • Mutant Football League 2 – (PS5, Xbox, PC) – “Mutant Football League 2 is a hard-hitting, arcade-style football game that combines intense gameplay, wisecracking mutants, weapons, deep strategy, and outrageous humor. Prepare yourself for the most insanely brutal football you’ll ever experience.”
  • Teeny Tiny Trains (Xbox) – “Remember turning the living room into your own railway kingdom? Experience a bit of that magic with Teeny Tiny Trains – Build tracks, flip switches, and dodge playful obstacles to guide your trains home.”
  • Drywall Eating Simulator (PC) – “A bite-sized (literally) comedic adventure where you relieve the stress of ordinary life by biting through walls. Therapy is expensive, but drywall is plentiful.”

Thursday (12/11/25):​

  • Cakey’s Twisted Bakery (Xbox) – “Cakey’s Twisted Bakery is a stealth survival horror where you must bake to survive. Trapped inside a deranged bakery crawling with sweet-toothed mascot monsters, you play as a lost child searching for your brother.”
  • Dunjungle (PS5, Xbox, PC) – “Dunjungle is an action-packed roguelite about a monkey hero, adventuring into a jungle under the menace of a corruptive power that is transforming its peaceful creatures and destroying everything on its way.”
  • Too Many Santas! (Xbox) – “It’s simply Too Many Santas! Can you watch all of them and run the store at the same time? Or will you be caught up in the sweet Santa romance?”
  • This Ain’t Even Poker, Ya Joker (PC) – “A unique incremental idle clicker where you flip cards to earn money, grow your hand, buy new decks, unlock powerful upgrades, discover new cards, and more. Can you defeat the Jester and escape the carnival?”
  • Warhammer 40,000: Rogue Trader (Switch 2) – “Begin your adventure aboard your personal, giant voidship, traveling between the multitude of systems within the Koronus Expanse, a barely charted and incredibly perilous region of space. Despite being considered a backwater of the Imperium, this region encompasses an enormous stretch of the void, filled with dangerous creatures and prodigious opportunities for profit and exploration. Your decisions matter, Lord-Captain.”

Friday (12/12/25):​

  • Ascendance Unbound (PS5, Xbox, Switch) – “Ascendance is a calming, relaxing and minimalist first person 3D Platformer. Shape your way with mysterious abilities and rise with the enchanted wind platforms beyond the skies within a world which evolves and transforms around you.”
  • Christmas Mutilator (Xbox) – “Inspired by the gritty atmosphere and taut suspense of 80s slasher films, Christmas Mutilator is a gripping, stealth-driven horror experience set in the chilly seclusion of a lonely, snow-covered cabin.”
  • Detective Girl: The Case for Immortality (PS5, Xbox, Switch) – “Return to Renaissance Florence and uncover an ancient secret of immortality. After a great war more than a decade ago, Europe lies in ruins, struggling to rebuild.”
  • Military Logistics Simulator (PC, PS5, Xbox) – “Military Logistics Simulator puts you behind the wheel of real-world military logistics. Rise from a low-ranking soldier to a seasoned quartermaster as you manage vehicles, expand your base, and take charge of critical supply lines. Deliver vital cargo and defend it from drone attacks, rescue survivors, and help rebuild a war-torn region after conflict — all in immersive first-person simulation. Play solo or with friends and earn your place, leading military operations from behind the lines.”
  • Terminator 2D: No Fate (PC, PS5, Xbox) – “Experience the events of ‘Terminator 2: Judgment Day’ brought to life through glorious pixel artwork and action-packed arcade gameplay!”
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