{"id":6812,"date":"2011-05-23T12:05:42","date_gmt":"2011-05-23T19:05:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/?p=6812"},"modified":"2011-05-23T02:56:33","modified_gmt":"2011-05-23T09:56:33","slug":"nethack-dead-again","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/2011\/05\/23\/nethack-dead-again\/","title":{"rendered":"Nethack: dead again"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a class=\"fancybox\" rel=\"6812\" href=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/05\/nethack_3.jpg\"<\/a><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/05\/nethack_3.jpg\" alt=\"\" title=\"nethack_3\" width=\"600\" height=\"408\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-6831\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Well, I&#8217;m dead, jerks. I&#8217;m dead in Nethack, and I&#8217;m getting the flu in real life. You may not care about the flu detail but this is called a &#8220;game diary.&#8221; I can write about my damn lunch if I want to. Dear diary: Today I ate a sandwich.<\/p>\n<p><strong>After the jump, how my character bit the big one<\/strong><!--more--><\/p>\n<p>At the time of his demise, my gnomish wizard had advanced to character level 6, and level 4 of the dungeon &#8212; pretty pathetic even by my own negligible standards. I had been descending slowly, trying to stay alive so I&#8217;d have things to write about, but this game is a bitch.<\/p>\n<p>Here&#8217;s the quick account of how I died:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>First, I was blinded in the process of killing &#8220;a yellow light,&#8221; a monster I don&#8217;t think I&#8217;d ever seen before.<\/li>\n<li>Hoping that this blindness was temporary, I wandered around to kill time until my vision came back. Of course, during this senseless stumbling, I was attacked by a monster, which I could neither identify nor cast spells at due to my blindness.<\/li>\n<li>Gravely wounded by the monster, I chugged my unidentified potions in the hopes that one of them would heal me. None of them did, but one of them turned out to be a potion of levitation.<\/li>\n<li>Really close to death now, retreat seemed my only option. I ran to a staircase I had found earlier, and tried to descend it, but I couldn&#8217;t, because that potion of levitation had me hovering above the ground. Not so far off the ground, mind you, that my unseen assailant couldn&#8217;t kill me. Which he promptly did. The end.<\/li>\n<li>Then I ate that sandwich.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Nethack may give you no useful information at all while you&#8217;re playing the game, but after you die it can&#8217;t wait to diarrhea-blast you with all the facts and figures that might have been useful, you know, two seconds earlier. It identifies your items, spits up a list of all the monsters you ever killed, and squeezes out a nice firm turd of details about your character. I learned that I &#8220;had transgressed&#8221;, for instance, whatever that means. Maybe it had something to do with the accidental pet kitten murder I committed with an errant &#8220;force bolt&#8221; spell. I also was apparently invisible at the time of my death, which must have been caused by one of the potions I frantically guzzled. This was news to me, because I had been blind at the time.<\/p>\n<p>Weird, isn&#8217;t it, that even though I was invisible, something was still able to kill me. Must have been a pretty fearsome beast, right? Well, along with the rest of the infodump, Nethack was happy to tell me who had rent me limb from limb.<\/p>\n<p>It was a little dog.<\/p>\n<p>Not just a dog.<\/p>\n<p>A little dog.<\/p>\n<p>Up next: Who the fuck knows? Did you see that I was just killed by a little dog?<br \/>\nClick <a href=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/2011\/05\/20\/nethack-wand-of-facepalm\/\">here<\/a> for the previous Nethack entry.<\/p>\n<p><em>Tony Carnevale is a writer who lives in New York City.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":1664,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[23],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6812","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-game-diaries"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Nethack: dead again - Quarter to Three<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/2011\/05\/23\/nethack-dead-again\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Nethack: dead again - 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