{"id":15497,"date":"2012-05-23T08:52:59","date_gmt":"2012-05-23T15:52:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/?p=15497"},"modified":"2013-09-01T12:38:50","modified_gmt":"2013-09-01T19:38:50","slug":"if-you-dont-look-good-diablo-iii-doesnt-look-good","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/2012\/05\/23\/if-you-dont-look-good-diablo-iii-doesnt-look-good\/","title":{"rendered":"If you don&#8217;t look good, Diablo III doesn&#8217;t look good"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a class=\"fancybox\" rel=\"15497\" href=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/Ranger_green_and_ready.jpg\"<\/a><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/Ranger_green_and_ready.jpg\" alt=\"\" title=\"Ranger_green_and_ready\" width=\"600\" height=\"356\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-15505\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>To quote stylist Tyler Durden, you are not your fucking khakis.  Neither are you your Socketed Silk Britches of the Bear.  With that in mind, let&#8217;s try to look our best while we&#8217;re fighting the minions of Diablo, lord of whatever he&#8217;s lord of.  I couldn&#8217;t hear when they explained that part because my ensemble was too loud.<\/p>\n<p><strong>After the jump, barbarian makeover<\/strong><!--more--><\/p>\n<p>So here we are in the changing area at one of the dress shops in the Caldeum bazaar.<\/p>\n<p><a class=\"fancybox\" rel=\"15497\" href=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/Square_One1.jpg\"<\/a><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/Square_One1.jpg\" alt=\"\" title=\"Square_One\" width=\"600\" height=\"344\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-15499\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Oh, look, Leah is tagging along.  Big surprise.  Hey Leah, why don&#8217;t you go tell the enchantress about your mother.  I&#8217;m sure she&#8217;d be fascinated.  No?  You&#8217;re just going to sit here and watch me change?  Okay, whatever.  Nice top, by the way.  It makes it easy to pick you out in a crowd.<\/p>\n<p>Okay, let&#8217;s kit up!<\/p>\n<p><a class=\"fancybox\" rel=\"15497\" href=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/The_basics.jpg\"<\/a><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/The_basics.jpg\" alt=\"\" title=\"The_basics\" width=\"600\" height=\"367\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-15500\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>So far, so good.  A hearty chestplate and bracers.  Comfortable boots without a heel.  Pants.  Wait, did I put on my pants?  Let me check.  Yep, those are my pants.  Well, &#8220;pants&#8221;.  I&#8217;d call it more of a loin cloth with a sort of dual leather strip garter belt thing going on.  But, yeah, pants.  Someone&#8217;s going to be really cold in Act III.<\/p>\n<p>Okay, let&#8217;s add the pauldrons.<\/p>\n<p><a class=\"fancybox\" rel=\"15497\" href=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/Demon_pauldrons.jpg\"<\/a><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/Demon_pauldrons.jpg\" alt=\"\" title=\"Demon_pauldrons\" width=\"600\" height=\"384\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-15501\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Oh my.  What are those, demon narwhals? Well, that&#8217;s certainly a choice.  A bit, uh, prominent.  Maybe the helmet will help.<\/p>\n<p><a class=\"fancybox\" rel=\"15497\" href=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/This_is_my_helm.jpg\"<\/a><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/This_is_my_helm.jpg\" alt=\"\" title=\"This_is_my_helm\" width=\"600\" height=\"402\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-15502\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Good lord, I look like I&#8217;m about to do Wagner at the Ozark Met.  <\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s time for one of Diablo III&#8217;s greatest inventions: vanishing dye.  Apply a dose of this stuff &#8212; for sale at fine potion vendors everywhere &#8212; and your ugly armor vanishes, but you still get the benefit of wearing it.  Let&#8217;s also get rid of the demon narwhal pauldrons.<\/p>\n<p><a class=\"fancybox\" rel=\"15497\" href=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/Helmless.jpg\"<\/a><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/Helmless.jpg\" alt=\"\" title=\"Helmless\" width=\"600\" height=\"392\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-15503\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Much better.  Besides, why would the barbarian want to hide that pretty face and lovely red hair?  The greaves look uncomfortable and dudish.  Let&#8217;s lose them.  And why bother with the loin cloth and garter belt combo?  Let&#8217;s really show off our thighs.<\/p>\n<p><a class=\"fancybox\" rel=\"15497\" href=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/The_thighs_have_it.jpg\"<\/a><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/The_thighs_have_it.jpg\" alt=\"\" title=\"The_thighs_have_it\" width=\"600\" height=\"392\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-15504\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Much better.  The barbarian has some wicked awesome thighs.  Why hide those puppies!<\/p>\n<p>Now it&#8217;s time for the final touch: a little color coordination.  The barbarian&#8217;s red hair naturally calls for a touch of green.  Apply doses of ranger green dye and we&#8217;ll be the talk of any party.<\/p>\n<p><a class=\"fancybox\" rel=\"15497\" href=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/Ranger_green_and_ready.jpg\"<\/a><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/Ranger_green_and_ready.jpg\" alt=\"\" title=\"Ranger_green_and_ready\" width=\"600\" height=\"356\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-15505\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Darling, you look <em>marvelous<\/em>!  Bella, bella!  Now let&#8217;s move on to the Witch Doctor.<\/p>\n<p><a class=\"fancybox\" rel=\"15497\" href=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/Beyond_hope.jpg\"<\/a><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/Beyond_hope.jpg\" alt=\"\" title=\"Beyond_hope\" width=\"600\" height=\"372\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-15506\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>On second thought, let&#8217;s not.  No amount of dye is going to fix that.  Sometimes you have to embrace the clownness of your outfit.  <\/p>\n<p>Up next, Butcher, dude, let&#8217;s talk.  Just because it&#8217;s the Chamber of Suffering doesn&#8217;t mean it has to be the Chamber of Bad Taste.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[18],"tags":[57],"class_list":["post-15497","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-games","tag-diablo-iii"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>If you don&#039;t look good, Diablo III doesn&#039;t look good - Quarter to Three<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.quartertothree.com\/fp\/2012\/05\/23\/if-you-dont-look-good-diablo-iii-doesnt-look-good\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"If you don&#039;t look good, Diablo III doesn&#039;t look good - 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