Lost on a Mountain in Afghanistan

QuarterToThree Message Boards: Free for all: Lost on a Mountain in Afghanistan
Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of pageLink to this message  By Osama Bin Laden on Monday, October 8, 2001 - 05:33 pm:

Hello, my friends. The electricity is out, so I can no longer play NFL2K2 over SegaNet. It is so boring sitting in these cave with no television. Looks like I'm going to miss the third episode of "Enterprise," which sucks because the Vulcan woman never fails to erect a little terrorist tent full of stinger missiles in my groinal area, if you know what I mean.

Meanwhile, I am so sick of reading these Gord thread. This man is a martyr for the cause of Islam. If Gord were to come to my defense at this hour of need, I could promise him 70 virgins in the afterworld to slap and beat up as he pleases, and anyone stealing from his Afterlife Video Game Stop would receive eternal bad credit from Allah himself.

I plead with you, my friends, stop bombing my land. If you do not, I will have no choice but to steal more copies of "Conker's Bad Fur Day" from your Canadian video game rental stores. And if you try to slap me, I will spray anthrax in your panties.

Praise be Allah,


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