Goddamn really, this movie sucked giant balls. I finally saw it and it was awful. And I thought Expendables was somewhat decent. What went wrong?

  • Direction was terrible. I think they effects and gore actually went downhill. And it's pretty easy to slip between PG-13 and R when all of the blood is digital. Just don't include it.
  • Fight scenes were terrible. The village sequence in the middle was probably the best, but the rest was just meh. Even the fight at the end was really bad and mainly composed of Stallone winning for 5 seconds, Van Damne winning for five seconds, then Stallone winning. Wait, that was the baddie fight at the end? Remember in the original where Stallone had that balls-out fight against the bodyguard dude? That was decent. This movie was not. Subpar.
  • Guest stars - I don't mind all of the great action people they had in this movie, but they needlessly and stupidly pandered to fan and action geeks by throwing in tons of stupid throwback lines to other movies or, in Norris' case, dead-horse-flogged-memes. Just have fucking characters be original characters without having to summon other movies. You didn't see this at all in the original movie, which was why it was much more respectable.
  • Music. WTF? Why was everything off-key and weird? The OST was horrific and there was no semblance to anything here, and you could barely hear the original theme. But because they use contrarian tones, it just sounds plum stupid.


Kind of a big disappointment to be honest. Expendables is a certain kind of movie, doesn't take itself too seriously yet it doesn't do the kind of stupid shit the sequel does.

--- Alan