Welcome to our newest member, pancakesandsex!

[Funkula]

Motto: "I am here to eat pancakes and have sex. And I'm all out of pancakes."

[hong]

Pancake sand sex? Sounds painful.

[Scrax]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoKZhaigLQA

Did somebody say pancakes and sex?

http://i35.tinypic.com/wras9e.jpg

[Pogue Mahone]

Well hell. Guess it'll be another six months until we get to exchange bon mots with this one. And still no Steve Meretzky.

[Tyjenks]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoKZhaigLQA

Did somebody say pancakes and sex?
HA!!!

[Griddle]

Pancake sand sex? Sounds painful.
Terrible mental image, MAKE IT STOP!!!

[krise madsen]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoKZhaigLQA

Did somebody say pancakes and sex?

http://i35.tinypic.com/wras9e.jpg

Technically, that's a waffle.

Respectfully

krise madsen

[Scrax]

Technically, that's a waffle.

Respectfully

krise madsen

I knew somebody would be out to ruin my fun. Might as well be a the Danish.

Rødgrød med fløde

[krise madsen]

I knew somebody would be out to ruin my fun. Might as well be a the Danish.

Rødgrød med fløde

If it's any consolation, we could just say it was a twatwaffle.

Respectfully

krise madsen

[jerri blank]

I demand that "twat" be immediately auto-replaced by "duck-billed platypus."

[krise madsen]

I demand that "twat" be immediately auto-replaced by "duck-billed platypus."


Apologies. It should have read tapirwaffle, obviously.

Respectfully

krise madsen

[MarinusWA]

There is only one species of platypus!

[Bill Dungsroman]

Which one of you jerks is trying to register "fartknocker?" That's my word, dammit!

[Griddle]

Which one of you jerks is trying to register "fartknocker?" That's my word, dammit!
Mmm heh heh, uhhh, damnit Beavis!!!

[Tracy Baker]

At least "twatwaffle" was presented respectfully.

[Rimbo]

I don't think I'm emotionally prepared to handle this thread right now.

[Griddle]

This thread is like one of those long, drawn out, wavering, quiet farts that gets progressively louder, then culminates in a loud pop, and a change of undergarments. :)

[Dave Perkins]

I think the pancake thread has ultimately delivered when it reaches Griddle.

[ElGuapo]

http://ownedirl.com/ancient_wisdom/surprise_buttsecks.jpg

[Omniscia]

Screw the pancakes, man. I could go for a bit o' crumpet right about now.

[Uncle Jules]

I tried explaining this thread to the nurse when she brought my meds this morning, but she told me not to get excited. I think she doesn't want a repeat of the tapioca incident.

More than anything, this thread reminds me of my old friend Quinn Hixon. Back during the depression we were a couple of high flying gamblers, going from town to town in the west and making a killing at the card tables. One day we walk into a little saloon in Topeka and bellied up to the bar for a beer. The barman was a bit suspicious, times being what they were, and wanted to see our money before he'd serve strangers. Well old Quinn was always the showy sort who like to be the center of attention so he pulls out his whole fat wad of money and slaps it down on the bar. "Good enough?" he asked the bartender. The bartender, impressed despite himself, nodded and served us both.

"Where'd you come by all that money?" the bartender asked Quinn.
"Well," says Quinn, "I'm a traveling gambler extraordinaire and I make a killing because I only bet on sure things! For example, I'll bet you $50 right now that I can bite my own right eye." The barman pondered that one for a moment and then took the bet. Quick as a flash, old Quinn whips out his glass eye and pops it in his mouth. The bartender, laughing in spite of himself, had to concede that was quite the trick. "Just give me a bottle of scotch and we'll call it even!" Quinn exclaimed grandly.

Later that night I was sitting at that same bar exhausted after too many beers and hands of poker when Quinn comes stumbling out of the card room. Now you have to understand that Quinn could drink and three priests you'd care to name under the table and still want a nightcap, so seeing him stumbling like that meant he'd had enough to pickle a whole field of onions. Quinn stumbles up to the bar and fixes the bartender with a woozy stare. "Let's have a rematch, I'll give you another chance to make $50 off of me" Quinn suggested to the bartender. The bartender was wary after his earlier loss, but didn't feel too threatened by a man so drunk he could barely stand.

"Sure," he said, "what's the bet?"

Quinn hopped up the bar and told the bartender that he'd bet him $50 that he could piss into an empty whiskey bottle on the top shelf of the bar and not miss a drop. The bartender pondered that one for a moment and then grabbed an empty whiskey bottle and put it on the top shelf. "You're on" he told Quinn, an evil grin on his face. "If you can do this you've earned every penny of that fifty dollars."

Well old Quinn dropped his trousers and took aim and proceeded to piss all over the bar, the barman, and myself. The bartender burst out laughing and took his fifty dollars from Quinn. "How did you expect to win a bet like that as drunk as you are?" asked the bartender.

"I didn't," replied Quinn, "But I bet every man in that cardroom $100 I could piss all over your bar and make you laugh about it!"

I don't remember what happened after that.

[Troy S Goodfellow]

another old joke

Two posts, two amusing but ancient gags.

So, this is going to be your schtick?

Troy

[jellyfish]

Two posts, two amusing but ancient gags. So, this is going to be your schtick?Ancient and not original (http://www.google.co.il/search?hl=en&client=firefox-a&rls=org.mozilla%3Aen-US%3Aofficial&q=I+bet+++I+could+piss+all+over+your+bar+and+make+ you+laugh+about+it&btnG=Search)

Maybe my schtick can be exposing others for the frauds that they are.

Also I am drunk. I though about posting in the official 'I am drunk thread'. But have you seen it? It is all sappy and sentimental and like "I love you man!" kind of teenage drunk stuff. Nevermind. Enough threadjacking.

edit: On reread, no glaring punctuation mistakes. Take that, 'whiskey friday' thread.

[Troy S Goodfellow]

Ancient and not original (http://www.google.co.il/search?hl=en&client=firefox-a&rls=org.mozilla%3Aen-US%3Aofficial&q=I+bet+++I+could+piss+all+over+your+bar+and+make+ you+laugh+about+it&btnG=Search)

Maybe my schtick can be exposing others for the frauds that they are.

Also I am drunk. I though about posting in the official 'I am drunk thread'. But have you seen it? It is all sappy and sentimental and like "I love you man!" kind of teenage drunk stuff. Nevermind. Enough threadjacking.

edit: On reread, no glaring punctuation mistakes. Take that, 'whiskey friday' thread.

Ancient implied unoriginal, of course. It's hard for a joke to be both ancient and a unique creation.

Troy

[Omniscia]

As long as we're talking about drunkenness, I'll mention to no one in particular that when I'm soused (which is a rare thing these days), I actually get more pedantic and my typing improves.

[BlueJackalope]

Well hell. Guess it'll be another six months until we get to exchange bon mots with this one. And still no Steve Meretzky.

That totally reminds me of something I forgot to do in the Bill D thread...

[Lum]

Ancient implied unoriginal, of course. It's hard for a joke to be both ancient and a unique creation.

I don't know, Catullus was pretty original.

[Troy S Goodfellow]

I don't know, Catullus was pretty original.

Catullus was a hack.

Troy

[Kunikos]

This thread is like one of those long, drawn out, wavering, quiet farts that gets progressively louder, then culminates in a loud pop, and a change of undergarments. :)

Also a change of shirt, because you know it got all over it.

[Scrax]

http://i37.tinypic.com/2whjbzk.jpg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6QWeyn8uoZg

This guy is ....um....passionate? about his work.

[Pogo]

Needs the same caption as the rabbit picture:
http://kimsal.com/rabbit_pancake.jpg

[Pogo]

Catullus was a hack.

Troy

You know, you don't have to sign each fucking post with your name. We can see your name.


disrespectfully

Pogo

[bago]

Not if you're zoomed in to column width on your iphone.

[Pogo]

Well there's your problem right there. You bought an iPhone.

[DoomMunky]

Somebody pee in your pancakes, Pogey?

[Troy S Goodfellow]

You know, you don't have to sign each fucking post with your name. We can see your name.


disrespectfully

Pogo

I do many things that I don't have to do. Like reply to morons.

Troy

[Rimbo]

Somebody pee in your pancakes, Pogey?

well it sure as hell wasn't me

[pancakesandsex]

One year later I finally notice this thread.

[RepoMan]

OH THANK GOD YOU TOLD US AS YOUR FIRST POST

And keep your sexual appendages AND pancakes to yourself, sir. Unless you post a picture of yourself making out with Erlend Grefsrud's girlfriend on top of a stack of pancakes. Or with pancakes on top. Or both.

[Pogue Mahone]

Hey, better late than never, pankcakesandsex. But seriously, what the hell happened to Steve Meretzky?

[russellmz00]

One year later I finally notice this thread.

http://www.angryflower.com/timelo.gif

[Griddle]

Upon further inspection, I love how the whole flow of the video gets fucked up by waffle, i love waffles, but fuck waffles in respect to this videography damnit.

[Mr_PeaCH]

Upon further inspection, I love how the whole flow of the video gets fucked up by waffle, i love waffles, but fuck waffles in respect to this videography damnit.

Griddle on waffles?

[Demon G Sides]

Griddle on waffles?

Game over man. Griddle, end it, get a new name, no funnier thing can be said about it.

[ceolstan]

So, this is going to be your schtick?


I don't think we need to have more discussions of schticks. There's been enough of that already.

So, who's making pancakes?

[Slainte Mhath]

Pancakesandsex - Viral marketer for viagra infused flapjacks or gamer guy with an Aunt Jemima fetish? I'm not sure which would be better...

[Griddle]

Game over man. Griddle, end it, get a new name, no funnier thing can be said about it.
Hahahaha...

[Uncle Jules]

Two posts, two amusing but ancient gags.

So, this is going to be your schtick?

Troy

This reminds me of a story about my old friend Quinn Hixon. Back in our college days we were quite the party guys and Quinn was the toast of campus. I'll tell you, old Quinn had a spare key was to every sorority house and on especially grand evenings needed more than one of them. The only girl on campus that could resist his charms was the beautiful Polly Buckeye. Polly was a charming young midwestern girl and well endowed with the special gifts that the Lord bestows only upon young women. Tragically, from the viewpoint of the young men on campus, she was a chaste as she was chased. Most of our friends had given up any hope of ever getting her to agree to a date but Quinn always got what he wanted one way or another.

After months of relentless pursuit she finally gave in out of sheer exasperation and invited Quinn to a fancy ball at her sorority. He even finagled an invitation and date for me as well. Knowing Quinn, he wanted an audience for his moment of triumph.

When the big night came we got dressed up in our nicest suits and were looking quite sharp if I do say so. We strolled over to the sorority house ready to make a big entrance and stopped dead at the door. Hanging over the door was a big banner which read "Annual Costume Ball." Nobody had told us our invitation was to a costume ball, so obviously we'd been set up to look foolish. I tried to persuade Quinn to just leave as a graceful retreat seemed like the only sensible thing to do, but Quinn would have none of it. Quick as a wink he threw off his jacket, removed his shoes and socks, and tossed his shirt and tie into the bushes. Clad only in his trousers he strutted up to the door of the sorority house and knocked on the door. The house mother, dressed as a wicked witch no less, opened the door and gave him a dubious look. "I can't let you in," she said. "A costume is mandatory for this event."

Quinn looked her in the eye, smiled his biggest smile, and proclaimed "I am in costume ma'am!"

"I'm dressed as a premature ejaculation. Look, I just came in my pants!"

I don't remember what happened after that.

[Griddle]

This reminds me of a story about my old friend Quinn Hixon. Back in our college days we were quite the party guys and Quinn was the toast of campus. I'll tell you, old Quinn had a spare key was to every sorority house and on especially grand evenings needed more than one of them. The only girl on campus that could resist his charms was the beautiful Polly Buckeye. Polly was a charming young midwestern girl and well endowed with the special gifts that the Lord bestows only upon young women. Tragically, from the viewpoint of the young men on campus, she was a chaste as she was chased. Most of our friends had given up any hope of ever getting her to agree to a date but Quinn always got what he wanted one way or another.

After months of relentless pursuit she finally gave in out of sheer exasperation and invited Quinn to a fancy ball at her sorority. He even finagled an invitation and date for me as well. Knowing Quinn, he wanted an audience for his moment of triumph.

When the big night came we got dressed up in our nicest suits and were looking quite sharp if I do say so. We strolled over to the sorority house ready to make a big entrance and stopped dead at the door. Hanging over the door was a big banner which read "Annual Costume Ball." Nobody had told us our invitation was to a costume ball, so obviously we'd been set up to look foolish. I tried to persuade Quinn to just leave as a graceful retreat seemed like the only sensible thing to do, but Quinn would have none of it. Quick as a wink he threw off his jacket, removed his shoes and socks, and tossed his shirt and tie into the bushes. Clad only in his trousers he strutted up to the door of the sorority house and knocked on the door. The house mother, dressed as a wicked witch no less, opened the door and gave him a dubious look. "I can't let you in," she said. "A costume is mandatory for this event."

Quinn looked her in the eye, smiled his biggest smile, and proclaimed "I am in costume ma'am!"

"I'm dressed as a premature ejaculation. Look, I just came in my pants!"

I don't remember what happened after that.

/golfclap :)

[pancakesandsex]

Actually this is the reason for the nick:

http://i80.photobucket.com/albums/j168/pancakesandsex/Me/Pancakesandsex.jpg

They were delicious.

[balut]

Wait, why would you want to have sex with this?
http://img690.imageshack.us/img690/552/pancakesv.jpg

[Griddle]

Wait, why would't you want to have sex with this?
http://img690.imageshack.us/img690/552/pancakesv.jpg
I edited your text, purely for your convenience.

[RepoMan]

Wait, why would't you want to have sex with this?
I edited your text, purely for your convenience.
I quoted your edit, purely for your embarrassment.

russellmz00 wins the big prize for serendipitous angry-flowerhood + sexy pancakes.

[Griddle]

I quoted your edit, purely for your embarrassment.

russellmz00 wins the big prize for serendipitous angry-flowerhood + sexy pancakes.
This is where I win, I have no shame. :P

[Ben Sones]

Technically, that's a waffle.

But she's lying on a stack of pancakes. So I guess it's sort of a three-way.

[RepoMan]

Let's get some biscuits up in this shizzle right HERE. And some motherfuckin' BACON. Fuck, we gonna have ourselves a lil' breakfast ORGY, BITCHES!

[Griddle]

Let's get some biscuits up in this shizzle right HERE. And some motherfuckin' BACON. Fuck, we gonna have ourselves a lil' breakfast ORGY, BITCHES!
I do believe you mentioned baked goods, as well as cured smoked breakfast meat.
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3492/4056382939_576c8a0cd9.jpg

[RepoMan]

CROISSANTS AND TURNOVERS, LIVING TOGETHER

http://content5.videojug.com/3f/3ff34616-f88b-436c-3243-1bc8477ac808/how-to-make-a-french-breakfast.jpg

JESUS AND MARY, IT LOOKS SOOOOO GOOD!

http://i217.photobucket.com/albums/cc201/allasbnb/EuropeanBreakfast.jpg

[Griddle]

CROISSANTS AND TURNOVERS, LIVING TOGETHER

JESUS AND MARY, IT LOOKS SOOOOO GOOD!

Mass hysteria!!!

Also:
I believe the bacon and orange juice in the Halloween glass ties it all together.