Rock on medicine!

[wildpokerman]

First it was the fact that drinking prevented heart disease.

Then tea prevented cancer.

Coffee can reduce your risk of liver disease.

However the holy grail of science has now been achieved:

http://www.newscientist.com/article.ns?id=dn3942

Who knew that I could have called all the time I have spent engaged in self pleasure "preventive medicine".

Exercise 5 times a week, floss your teeth and spank the monkey for a long healthy life!

[VictoriaWong]

Not according to Cohen's description of traditional (East) Indian medicine, where "It takes more energy to make a drop of semen than it takes to make a nuclear bomb!"
From his 1999 essay, "The History of Semen: Notes on a Culture-Bound Syndrome"

Sorry, no link. I read a paper copy.

[Enduro_Man]

Exercise 5 times a week, floss your teeth and spank the monkey for a long healthy life!
Yes, but you run an increased risk of developing glaucoma and volar hypertrichosis.

[Sidd_Budd]

Thank god for masturbation, because oral sex is deadly. (http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn11819-oral-sex-can-cause-throat-cancer.html)

So excuse me while I sulk while preventing heart disease and prostate cancer.