Sebmolo
06-01-2005, 02:51 PM
Off some Latvian forum:
* Finding a Priest
When you are forming a team and you decide that you do want a priest, remember that most priests are desperate to find a team since their low (if any) damage does not endear them to teammates. Consequently, you do not need to be polite or even say anything, like you do when you're trying to get a mage or an warrior to join your team. The preferred method for recruiting priests is to travel to a crowded area, target a priest, then run all the way to the other end of the crowd and click on "invite." Make sure the priest can't see you when she looks around and make sure to either ignore or at least delay any responses to /tells or any questions from her. If she doesn't join your team right away or declines your invite, run back up to her (from behind) and click on "invite" 19 more times. Advanced players can attempt to use the /who function and be in a completely different zone when they invite.
* Buffing with a Priest
Now that your team is formed, the first order of business is to buff up. Make sure you do not give the priest any of your often sought after buffs unless she asks for them since she probably finds that the many icons in her GUI can distract her from healing.
* Questing with a Priest
Team quests are just like solo quests, only there are five of you, so you can go five times as fast. Make sure to split up (if you are in an instance such as Gnomeregan, be sure to be on separate levels) and kill as fast as you can so that you don't waste any of the priest's time. Also, remember that having a priest in the team means that you will always be healed, so there is no need to stop between fights to heal up. Most good priests have unlimited mana so they will always be ready with the heals, making combat a cinch. Run into the largest room you can find and attack the middle mob. Make sure to stay in the large room as fighting in the adjacent room will likely cause less mobs to attack your team, which slows down the amount of experience you get and pisses off the priest. To further save time, make sure to loot chests and rollable items only during or right after a fight--the priests frantic team heal spamming because of the fight you started will cover any incidental damage from any additional mob attacks during that time. If the priest takes aggro, let her keep it. She is the healer and it's easier for her to heal herself then to heal anyone else.
If your team is busy rebuffing or someone is away from the computer, run until you are well out of range and start attacking mobs on your own. Hold your ground and shout for heals as needed. Also note that priests like to see you split off from the team as it works its way through the instance and for you to start a separate fight because it tells us that you are taking initiative and we will finish the quest sooner. If you get into trouble, the priest will leave the rest of the team and come running to your aid, or (and this is rare), she won't and you will have to train your mobs to the rest of the team, who will be happy to help you kill them.
After the fight is over, avoid using your bandages or food, especially if you are the only person injured and the priest has full mana. We enjoy helping everyone else out and we know how expensive your bandages and food are so we would much rather use our drinks to save you the hassle of siting down, healing, and standing back up again. Remember, because most low to mid level priests don't use weapons, we are made of money.
* Fighting
Many priests foolishly believe that, just because they are your heal monkey, that this gives them some right to make tactical decisions like saying what mobs are too hard or by ordering retreats. A priest who tells her teammates to run only does so because she is a coward, blinded from the battle by staring at everyone's Health and mana. She doesn't have the vast tactical training nor combat experience you have that comes from your countless hours of pressing Tab then Attack while watching reruns of Giligan's Island on TV, so it's usually best to either ignore her or do the opposite of what she says. But remember, if you get into trouble, run into another room and spam "HJEEL" until the priest gets aggro from using her team heals, then when you get healed back to half life, start looting chests and corpses.
Note that priests don't have any attack spells worth using - they're priests! Many claim to be "shadow specc'ed" or the like, but that's simply an RP device. If your priest attempts to cast any attack spells, it's likely they did so accidently. They always appreciate being reminded of their purpose. A tell (or better, party chat) that informs them of that fact (Something like "OMFG, u r a preist!!!1 U onle heel!!!) is always appreciated. Remember, some people play multiple characters, and may forget they aren't playing a mage.
Hunters, remember that your pet is one of your most important class features. Priests know that, and will always keep track of your pet's health - there's no need to let them know if the pet is hurt. Most priests are running custom UI's they wrote in their spare time that track pet health. If they claim they "can't see the pet's health" then they are probably a n00b, or lying, but they may just be joking. It's best to ignore them, and just let your pet get hurt. If it does get down to less than 10% health, you should then remind them to heal it, as they may again be distracted by all the icons on their screen. Something like "Hey, Bob's hurt, moron." is good (always be sure to refer to your pet by name, as most priests love to rp, and it makes it easier to remember who you mean).
If you are a shaman, druid, or paladin, you'll be pleased that you have a priest in the group - you no longer need to worry about healing! Priests play the game to heal people, so it would actually be rude of you to heal party members - you'd just be taking away from their fun. All priests assume you know this, and typically won't mention it, and you shouldn't either. Sometimes they'll say funny things during combat like "Druid, heal the mage!" They're just joking around, and will heal the mage before you could anyway, so just keep attacking!
* Looting
Priests have no claim on any items. If they ask for anything, they are being greedy as they clearly have no use for weapons, armor, and any other uber gear. Also, if your team's priest loots something, always ask to roll for it. If you are a warrior, you are more than welcome to roll for BoP cloth armor since we know that you need the money from vendoring it for your high level abilities. Since you do an awesome job tanking, we have no use for the armor.
* Dying
Let's face it, most priests are far less uber then you and thus their healing skills will, on occasion, fail to keep you alive. If you do die, it was because of a mistake the priest made and has nothing to do with you going into another part of the instance by yourself while the rest of your team is on the level below buffing. It probably has something to do with the priest being "gay" or "a homo" (or both), so you should do your best to warn the rest of your team that the priest is "a gay homo" so they know to be careful. But, because some team members may not necessarily believe you, you must first prove your uberness by describing how long you have been playing for and then call the priest a n00b. It helps if you swear, use ALL CAPS, and misspell everything. Not only will this encourage the priest to try harder next time, but it will actually increase your chance that she'll want to team with you again. Note that if the priest dies instead of you, she always appreciates messages that say "heal!!!" as she's running back from the graveyard. It shows that you care, that you are paying attention, and that her heals are missed.
* Thanking a Priest
If a priest saves your ass after you pull more mobs then there are people on your team, the best way to thank her for keeping everyone alive is to repeat whatever actions you took that caused the dangerous fight. This complements the priest by saying 'you are so good I feel free to be totally reckless' and it makes us feel good too. Also, the best way to thank a priest is to share with her your many pearls of priest wisdom you have picked up playing warriors, paladins, hunters, and mages. Tell them things like "+1 int is far more important than +20def, my taunt will keep that elite off your gimp ass" or "mana potions are just as good as melon juice so it doesn't matter if you are in a fight."
Priest's Dictionary
When you team up with priests, you might hear them use some strange terms (such as WTF!?!) and this Priest Dictionary will help you translate them.
add: This is short for 'ADDitional monsters needed' and is used when the monster you are fighting is an easy kill and the priest feels the team can handle more. When you hear this, run into adjoining rooms and pull more mobs into the fight.
afk: This common term stands for "Attack, Fight, Kill" and is the priest's way of telling you to go pull mobs.
brb: An acronym, this is short for "Boss Room Battle," and is a priest's way of telling the team it's time to fight the cave or instance boss. Note that you will also sometimes see "afk brb," meaning the same thing.
HELP: This stands for "Hit Everything! Leet Priest! This will often be shouted as the priest does a victory dance around the group, leading monsters around. He's just taunting them - don't feel the need to attack them. Just go get some more to add to the fun!
out of mana: If your priest says this after a fight, make sure to count to 3-Mississippi before you run three rooms down and start another major fight. This will allow the priest more than enough time to recover her mana.
oom: Some people believe this to be an abbreviation for "out of mana." They are mistaken. What this really means is "Out of Mobs" and that more should be pulled into the fight as soon as possible as to limit the downtime and not waste the priest's time.
puller: The team's puller has the important job of "pulling" the team into fights. Usually this is accomplished by having someone with a gun with and cloth armor shoot a social mob for 1/20th of its health or by having a similarly Health gimped teammate run into a room and fire off at least three special attacks, thereby pulling the rest of the team into the room to save him. Note that the puller does not have to be the same person every time and it is often best if different people pull as to keep the priest guessing who will drop to 1/3 their life and make her try to figure out what room they are in.
rez sick: When priest say they are rez sick, it means they are sick of dying and resurrecting and they want to go straight to the room in the instance that killed them the first time and start fighting.
tank: This is the person whose job it is to pull mobs to the priest.
wait: "wait" is a bit tricky. While it sounds like the word "wait," as in 'stop,' what the priest is really saying is a shortened version of "WAste IT all." meaning destroy everything in the area. Priests will use this if they want you to start charging the instance.
WTF!?!: This means "Way To Fight" and is used to complement you on your brilliant tactical choices.
Note to Priests
As a priest, it is your job to keep everyone alive no matter what they do or what their AC is. Some priests claim it is only their job to assist teammates with heals and buffs and that it's ultimately up to each player to be responsible for himself, but that simply isn't true. A good priest will be able to keep anyone alive regardless of what happens, and over 95% of all team deaths are due to a failure on the priest's part. I'm sorry to let our secret out, but yes, we are miracle workers. I haven't ever lost a teammate and if you try real hard too, you will also keep everyone alive.
* Finding a Priest
When you are forming a team and you decide that you do want a priest, remember that most priests are desperate to find a team since their low (if any) damage does not endear them to teammates. Consequently, you do not need to be polite or even say anything, like you do when you're trying to get a mage or an warrior to join your team. The preferred method for recruiting priests is to travel to a crowded area, target a priest, then run all the way to the other end of the crowd and click on "invite." Make sure the priest can't see you when she looks around and make sure to either ignore or at least delay any responses to /tells or any questions from her. If she doesn't join your team right away or declines your invite, run back up to her (from behind) and click on "invite" 19 more times. Advanced players can attempt to use the /who function and be in a completely different zone when they invite.
* Buffing with a Priest
Now that your team is formed, the first order of business is to buff up. Make sure you do not give the priest any of your often sought after buffs unless she asks for them since she probably finds that the many icons in her GUI can distract her from healing.
* Questing with a Priest
Team quests are just like solo quests, only there are five of you, so you can go five times as fast. Make sure to split up (if you are in an instance such as Gnomeregan, be sure to be on separate levels) and kill as fast as you can so that you don't waste any of the priest's time. Also, remember that having a priest in the team means that you will always be healed, so there is no need to stop between fights to heal up. Most good priests have unlimited mana so they will always be ready with the heals, making combat a cinch. Run into the largest room you can find and attack the middle mob. Make sure to stay in the large room as fighting in the adjacent room will likely cause less mobs to attack your team, which slows down the amount of experience you get and pisses off the priest. To further save time, make sure to loot chests and rollable items only during or right after a fight--the priests frantic team heal spamming because of the fight you started will cover any incidental damage from any additional mob attacks during that time. If the priest takes aggro, let her keep it. She is the healer and it's easier for her to heal herself then to heal anyone else.
If your team is busy rebuffing or someone is away from the computer, run until you are well out of range and start attacking mobs on your own. Hold your ground and shout for heals as needed. Also note that priests like to see you split off from the team as it works its way through the instance and for you to start a separate fight because it tells us that you are taking initiative and we will finish the quest sooner. If you get into trouble, the priest will leave the rest of the team and come running to your aid, or (and this is rare), she won't and you will have to train your mobs to the rest of the team, who will be happy to help you kill them.
After the fight is over, avoid using your bandages or food, especially if you are the only person injured and the priest has full mana. We enjoy helping everyone else out and we know how expensive your bandages and food are so we would much rather use our drinks to save you the hassle of siting down, healing, and standing back up again. Remember, because most low to mid level priests don't use weapons, we are made of money.
* Fighting
Many priests foolishly believe that, just because they are your heal monkey, that this gives them some right to make tactical decisions like saying what mobs are too hard or by ordering retreats. A priest who tells her teammates to run only does so because she is a coward, blinded from the battle by staring at everyone's Health and mana. She doesn't have the vast tactical training nor combat experience you have that comes from your countless hours of pressing Tab then Attack while watching reruns of Giligan's Island on TV, so it's usually best to either ignore her or do the opposite of what she says. But remember, if you get into trouble, run into another room and spam "HJEEL" until the priest gets aggro from using her team heals, then when you get healed back to half life, start looting chests and corpses.
Note that priests don't have any attack spells worth using - they're priests! Many claim to be "shadow specc'ed" or the like, but that's simply an RP device. If your priest attempts to cast any attack spells, it's likely they did so accidently. They always appreciate being reminded of their purpose. A tell (or better, party chat) that informs them of that fact (Something like "OMFG, u r a preist!!!1 U onle heel!!!) is always appreciated. Remember, some people play multiple characters, and may forget they aren't playing a mage.
Hunters, remember that your pet is one of your most important class features. Priests know that, and will always keep track of your pet's health - there's no need to let them know if the pet is hurt. Most priests are running custom UI's they wrote in their spare time that track pet health. If they claim they "can't see the pet's health" then they are probably a n00b, or lying, but they may just be joking. It's best to ignore them, and just let your pet get hurt. If it does get down to less than 10% health, you should then remind them to heal it, as they may again be distracted by all the icons on their screen. Something like "Hey, Bob's hurt, moron." is good (always be sure to refer to your pet by name, as most priests love to rp, and it makes it easier to remember who you mean).
If you are a shaman, druid, or paladin, you'll be pleased that you have a priest in the group - you no longer need to worry about healing! Priests play the game to heal people, so it would actually be rude of you to heal party members - you'd just be taking away from their fun. All priests assume you know this, and typically won't mention it, and you shouldn't either. Sometimes they'll say funny things during combat like "Druid, heal the mage!" They're just joking around, and will heal the mage before you could anyway, so just keep attacking!
* Looting
Priests have no claim on any items. If they ask for anything, they are being greedy as they clearly have no use for weapons, armor, and any other uber gear. Also, if your team's priest loots something, always ask to roll for it. If you are a warrior, you are more than welcome to roll for BoP cloth armor since we know that you need the money from vendoring it for your high level abilities. Since you do an awesome job tanking, we have no use for the armor.
* Dying
Let's face it, most priests are far less uber then you and thus their healing skills will, on occasion, fail to keep you alive. If you do die, it was because of a mistake the priest made and has nothing to do with you going into another part of the instance by yourself while the rest of your team is on the level below buffing. It probably has something to do with the priest being "gay" or "a homo" (or both), so you should do your best to warn the rest of your team that the priest is "a gay homo" so they know to be careful. But, because some team members may not necessarily believe you, you must first prove your uberness by describing how long you have been playing for and then call the priest a n00b. It helps if you swear, use ALL CAPS, and misspell everything. Not only will this encourage the priest to try harder next time, but it will actually increase your chance that she'll want to team with you again. Note that if the priest dies instead of you, she always appreciates messages that say "heal!!!" as she's running back from the graveyard. It shows that you care, that you are paying attention, and that her heals are missed.
* Thanking a Priest
If a priest saves your ass after you pull more mobs then there are people on your team, the best way to thank her for keeping everyone alive is to repeat whatever actions you took that caused the dangerous fight. This complements the priest by saying 'you are so good I feel free to be totally reckless' and it makes us feel good too. Also, the best way to thank a priest is to share with her your many pearls of priest wisdom you have picked up playing warriors, paladins, hunters, and mages. Tell them things like "+1 int is far more important than +20def, my taunt will keep that elite off your gimp ass" or "mana potions are just as good as melon juice so it doesn't matter if you are in a fight."
Priest's Dictionary
When you team up with priests, you might hear them use some strange terms (such as WTF!?!) and this Priest Dictionary will help you translate them.
add: This is short for 'ADDitional monsters needed' and is used when the monster you are fighting is an easy kill and the priest feels the team can handle more. When you hear this, run into adjoining rooms and pull more mobs into the fight.
afk: This common term stands for "Attack, Fight, Kill" and is the priest's way of telling you to go pull mobs.
brb: An acronym, this is short for "Boss Room Battle," and is a priest's way of telling the team it's time to fight the cave or instance boss. Note that you will also sometimes see "afk brb," meaning the same thing.
HELP: This stands for "Hit Everything! Leet Priest! This will often be shouted as the priest does a victory dance around the group, leading monsters around. He's just taunting them - don't feel the need to attack them. Just go get some more to add to the fun!
out of mana: If your priest says this after a fight, make sure to count to 3-Mississippi before you run three rooms down and start another major fight. This will allow the priest more than enough time to recover her mana.
oom: Some people believe this to be an abbreviation for "out of mana." They are mistaken. What this really means is "Out of Mobs" and that more should be pulled into the fight as soon as possible as to limit the downtime and not waste the priest's time.
puller: The team's puller has the important job of "pulling" the team into fights. Usually this is accomplished by having someone with a gun with and cloth armor shoot a social mob for 1/20th of its health or by having a similarly Health gimped teammate run into a room and fire off at least three special attacks, thereby pulling the rest of the team into the room to save him. Note that the puller does not have to be the same person every time and it is often best if different people pull as to keep the priest guessing who will drop to 1/3 their life and make her try to figure out what room they are in.
rez sick: When priest say they are rez sick, it means they are sick of dying and resurrecting and they want to go straight to the room in the instance that killed them the first time and start fighting.
tank: This is the person whose job it is to pull mobs to the priest.
wait: "wait" is a bit tricky. While it sounds like the word "wait," as in 'stop,' what the priest is really saying is a shortened version of "WAste IT all." meaning destroy everything in the area. Priests will use this if they want you to start charging the instance.
WTF!?!: This means "Way To Fight" and is used to complement you on your brilliant tactical choices.
Note to Priests
As a priest, it is your job to keep everyone alive no matter what they do or what their AC is. Some priests claim it is only their job to assist teammates with heals and buffs and that it's ultimately up to each player to be responsible for himself, but that simply isn't true. A good priest will be able to keep anyone alive regardless of what happens, and over 95% of all team deaths are due to a failure on the priest's part. I'm sorry to let our secret out, but yes, we are miracle workers. I haven't ever lost a teammate and if you try real hard too, you will also keep everyone alive.