Devil May Cry needs a new quip writer

Posted by on January 18, 2013 in Games

Things besides “fuck you” that Dante says in a boss battle against a succubus (pictured):

1) “You’re dumped.” (upon dropping her into a pool of lava)
2) “You’re all mixed up.” (upon pushing her into spinning blades)
3) “Suck on this, succubus.”

  • Brandon

    So far I am supremely disappointed with the lack of quotes that recognize the game shares the same name as half of Run-DMC. I keep hoping for a “It’s McDaniels, not McDonalds, these swords are Dante’s but the burgers are Ronald’s.”. Come on, Capcom!

  • Mercanis

    Aren’t succubi supposed to be seductive? Does the creature start with an alternate appearance? If not, she must have a hard time doing her job.

  • Svenska

    Fugliest succubus I’ve ever seen.

  • Mark L

    I guess now I know what the writers for Diablo 3 have been up to.

  • wykstrad

    To be fair, I’m pretty sure there’s a U.N. resolution requiring that the third quote be featured in any videogame involving a succubus. Devil May Cry is just doing its part to uphold international law!

  • wisdomchild

    He should’ve gone with the simple, but devastating, “Nice face.”

  • anon

    Moarliek yuckubus.

  • http://www.facebook.com/gregcarere Greg Carere

    Not gonna lie, I kind of love “Suck on this, succubus.” It’d be a great post-touchdown chant for the Devil City Incubi cheerleaders.

  • http://twitter.com/clwheeljack Charles Wheeler

    Yeah. One does wonder if the writers of DMC know what a succubus is.

    I’m not saying it should be, like, Morrigan-level sexualized or anything. But I’d prefer recognizably female.

  • amanda_chen

    Well, what does an expert say on this matter? SInistrari says:

    Demoniality [sex with an incubus or succubus] is copulation with a corpse, a senseless and motionless corpse which is but accidentally moved through the power of the Demon.

    Doesn’t sound so hot now, does it?

  • tomchick

    You go through a couple of levels knowing that you’re looking for a succubus. Which, naturally, creates certain expectations.

    Then you find that thing.

    Thanks, Ninja Theory.

  • tomchick

    Please play Devil May Cry so you can use that in an article instead of squandering it on a comments section.

  • Brandon

    Oh, I am. Easier combat, yay!

  • amanda_chen

    Yeah, demons look like shit.

  • http://www.time.com/ Matt Peckham

    Amen.

  • http://twitter.com/gndwyn Urthman

    “I’ll put you on a bus that sucks!”

  • http://twitter.com/gndwyn Urthman

    (fourth-wall-breaking product placement)
    “You really make my NVIDIA brand video card suck power from the PCI bus!”